Magic Man!
Did you see the fucking dunk contest this past weekend?
WHOA.
Dwight Howard is the fucking dude!
Are you serious? That shit wasn’t even close.
This kid is a fucking freak of nature, end of story.
OH, speaking of Magic, I’ve never went to the Magic show in Las Vegas, in fact I must be the only person left that lives in Hawaii that hasn’t been to Las Vegas. ANYWAY, I found this piece below about the Magic show on one of my recent favorite websites, Satchel Of Gravel, shit is fucking good!
http://www.satchelofgravel.com/
To us, the best part of Magic (The real Gathering) are the conversations that people start based on what kicks you’re wearing.
Here are the five most frequent lines that Air Farce, Punch CP and myself encountered at the show, at the parties and while in line waiting for cabs. We’ve also taken the liberty to provide the translations of what these people really meant.
1 - “I’m just out here on my grind, you know? Just hustling.”
Translation: I’m looking for a job. Do you know of anyone hiring? I have no real discernible skills, with the exception of being good at both carrying and smoking weed.
2 - “My line is streetwear inspired, but for the mass market.”
Translation: I’m out here looking at what the popular streetwear lines are doing, then I am going back to my factories in Korea and create similar products to sell at price point retail. The irony is that my knock off will make 10x more then the original. So while we’re mixing Crown Royal and Coors Light to celebrate, you’ll be sitting on your LE skateboard trying to figure out how to pay your electricity bill.
3 - “What brand do you think has done it the best this season?”
Translation: It costs too much for Internet in my hotel room so I haven’t been able to log on to any cool guy sites to see who’s been getting the most e-props. Can you please give me some suggestions on who I should be dick-riding for?
4 - “I loved Don’t Believe the Hypebeast and I really love Satchel of Gravel.”
Translation: I hate Satchel of Gravel. You make fun of the culture that I’ve taken refuge in after my days as a candy raver. Please go away [again] so my brand can go back to profiting off of stolen graphics and re appropriated rap lyrics and not getting called out for it.
5 - “What are you guys getting into tonight?”
Translation: I have no friends and have not been invited to any parties. If at all possible, can I tag along with you guys? If not, it’s cool. I’ll just go find me a hooker at the Wynn bar.
Viva Magic.